Hercules (Brett Ratner, USA 2014)

• This was a longer trailer than the earlier versions I saw–it actually doesn’t look anywhere near as bad now. I’m not sure if that’s a good or a bad thing, since it looked like a contender for worst movie of all time and thus was sure to include some great unintentional comedy.

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (Robert Rodriguez/Frank Miller, USA 2014)

• Please tell me Frank Miller is a director in title only again.
• Eva Green in black and white=reason to see a movie.
• Joseph Gordon-Levitt is one of the best actors in the world and he spent a number of years picking fantastic projects. I’m starting to worry that he’s entering the “big-budget action movie” phase of his career instead of continuing in that vein, but maybe his presence is a sign that this film is going to work.
• The first film wasn’t great but I enjoyed it, so that’s really all I’m hoping for this time.

The Judge (David Dobkin, USA 2014)

• This looks like a parody of a movie. Really. Seriously. It does not look at all real.
• When was the last time Robert Duvall actually acted? 1980? Earlier? He’s been playing the exact same part the exact same way for longer than Al Pacino.
• The way the title is written somehow looks old.
• Was the working title Trouble with the Gavel?
• Billy Bob Thornton is still alive?

Unbroken (Angelina Jolie, USA 2014)

• Angelina Jolie has clearly made something special here: she has combined jingoism, Holocaust movie syndrome, and Oscar baiting into one concoction so rich and frothy that I could throw up just thinking about it.
• Snark aside, it’s interesting that she actually is not using her star power to attract a star-studded cast.
• Also interesting: Two of the four screenwriters are the Coen brothers.
• More interesting: Unless I just missed it, the Coen brothers’ presence was unmentioned in the trailer (aside from the credits screen at the end, of course).
• Snark returning: Is Jolie trying to prove her American-ness with this film?

Coca-Cola

• The Polar Bears “trailer” is stupid and I’m so tired of seeing it. Both theaters in town play it before every single movie. Kill it.

Weirdly, that was it. They still managed to spend 15 minutes on previews, but it was mostly commercials for the theater itself.